“A parent participating in a bike-to-school event in Philadelphia’s Queen Village neighborhood was struck by a vehicle Wednesday morning.”
“I heard a car honking behind me and revving and before I knew it there was a jeep that had run me over…I was on the ground”
was struck by a vehicle
Was no one driving the vehicle? Why the passive voice?
Car brain
I wonder how they describe it when a cop gets run over.
Headline:
Bribed Mercenary Class Traitor Pig-Ummm we mean Heroic Goddess Queen Cop Who Shot Numerous Homeless People And Evicted Dozens Of Single Parents struck by terrible drunk driver. Death penalty on the cards says the DA.District Attorney Leopard-Ate-My-Face had this to add about the incident: “This police officer was a heroic goddess! Do you know what she did this one time - there were a bunch of people peacefully protesting the construction of a new highway that would shred through a historical Native American community …so she did what any heroic goddess cop in that situation wouod do and she shot three of the protestors in the head…twice…my hero mmmmmph 🥰😍. We cant let heroic goddesses cops like this get hit by reckless drunk drivers . These drunk drivers need to be put on trial …then put to death! !¿!¡”
Reporter: “…Umm …it was actually found that rhe driver was completely sober during the crash according to the breathalyzer. They even ran the test thrice. We think that the crash was cause that police officer was running around on a part of the road that isnt marked as a crosswalk-”.
Attorney Leopard-Ate-My-Face: “Fake news. DIdnt happen. No more questions” 🏃🏼♀️
Reporter: “Wait! Please! -”
The DA’s office has not returned any of our phone calls or emails after this interview.
It would probably go something likee that.
INTENTIONALLY hit
Attempted man slaughter
Is the driver going to go away for attempted murder? Lose their license? Anything?
Hahaha good joke. Do you even know how much a slap on the wrist hurts???
Oh yeah, our elementary school was doing that event though we already walked to school. It’s weird how car centric people are even on that day. Not a single house is more than a 15 minute walk to the school but there’s always a chaotic mess of cars in front every morning.
They’re always the worst kind of people, too. Honking and doing illegal things and only maybe 20% have car seats for their kids. We always gotta be as careful as possible, but at least it’s just the streets immediately around the school; the rest of the walk is lovely, albeit with tons of mosquitoes lately.
