LOL

extra power under load to the rear wheels

Lol like there’s enough room back there to add a load.

I don’t remember that Converse tagline … but back then I was wearing Sears Toughskins instead of Levis, that should make it clear how fashionable I was. “Limousines for the Feet” is a pretty laughable slogan, though, since chucks are about the least comfortable shoes in the history of humanity - even Ötzi’s fucking bird’s nest shoes were probably more comfortable.

FYI the original Converse shoes came out in 1917. Now get off my lawn.

Better or worse than rape-via-twitter? Better, I guess.

I’m a programmer. In 2010 I had a boss come up to me and tell me we should start using APIs. He had just read an article about how APIs were the next big thing. Fortunately he had a short attention span and soon wandered off and never mentioned APIs again, and I was able to get back to work on the awesome Blackberry app I was writing.