Not sure if they do it deliberately, but there’s like this sorta expectation to sympathize with parents who despite being poor still have children. Didn’t they make a CHOICE though? Do you think they should be solely responsible for making it?

  • qvi8dhqln@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
    2·
    3 days ago

    By that logic I should be helped, because I want a ferarri 🤣. But only poor families are afforded the sympathy (at least that’s the sentiment people IRL seem to have)

    • Blisterexe@lemmy.zip
      13·
      3 days ago

      I think you can see how having a child and wanting to live decently is different from wanting a luxury. Very often poor families are poor for circumstances out of their control that happened since the birth of the child, as well, like loss of job, inflation, or divorce.

      I feel like you made this thread just to talk about how you don’t like poor families.

      • qvi8dhqln@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
        1·
        3 days ago

        Nah, I don’t actually. How? Like come on, Im tired of pretending I do see it lol 🤣. How’s having a child that you KNOW is going to end up costing you about the same as said ferrari (or maybe a couple of mazdas or corolas or whatever, you get the point) over the span of you supporting him/her different from wanting to buy something.But I can’t just straight up say that IRL, for obvious reasons without peopls looking at me like Im crazy 😀

        • Blisterexe@lemmy.zip
          13·
          3 days ago

          It’s because a baby is a person, and having one is a natural part of human life, whereas a ferrari is a luxury. Also, once you have a child you cannot get rid of it ethically, so the parents should be helped. The sympathy comes from “this person cannot live a dignified life because of situation”.

          I also think that everything that is necessary for life should be free, so the idea that people don’t deserve a decent life for any reason or decision is foreign to me.

          I don’t know how to explain to you that you should have empathy.

          • qvi8dhqln@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
            1·
            3 days ago

            Well, so is wanting luxary. Like come on, would you drive a corola if you buying a ferrari was 0.1% of your yearly net income or whetver?

            You WANT luxary, its just you can not AFFORD it. 🙂

            Same with kids: you WANT them, you just can’t AFFORD them.

            But in 1 case you “deserve” empathy and in another you “don’t”.

            Or am I missing your interpretation of “a natural part of human life”? How’s wanting offspring is more “natural” than, say, wanting a box of cool lego or getting a nice figure (yeah, I’d like the government to subsidize my weight loss, like why not? What if I am miserable enough being fat)?🙂

            • Blisterexe@lemmy.zip
              8·
              3 days ago

              It’s natural because we would all die if it weren’t, but you’re avoiding my main argument. I said that the sympathy comes from “this person cannot live a dignified life because of situation” and the situation being bringing another person into the world.

              Your Ferrari analogy fails because in that case you want “luxury” but in the child case they already have a child but you can’t afford to live, instead of being able to live but not having a luxury they want. I would feel sympathy for someone who, say, bought a luxury then lost their job, and are now having a really hard time because they no longer have any savings.

              Also, don’t you think it’s a bit sad that having children, something people have famously done since forever, is now something you can be priced out of? (Also where I live the government does subsidize weight loss, if it’s bad enough to really impact your life)

              edit: lmao dude stopped responding the second someone made an argument he couldn’t just wave away with the same premade argument

              • qvi8dhqln@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
                1·
                3 days ago
                1. So your description of “natural” is “something we would die off without”? Ok. But that only makes sense on a populational level, an individual won’t die without producing offspring. And my question was specifically targeted at individual judgement. We aren’t a hivemind, you can act differently than the people around you.
                2. Like I said, any reasonable person understands that the possibility of life storms (such as being laid off, having health issues at some point in your life, child being born with disability) is the thing that should be accounted for. Otherwise… You haven’t thought that through, now have you 🙃?

                🙂 And who is to blame for that? And if you believe in personal responsibility and freedom of will, shouldn’t it be treated like an unreasonable desicion then? Same way you treat eating at a fancy restaurant and then not having any money to eat for a week.

                1. What do you mean, “the situation”? It sounds like you’re suggesting that having a kid is something out of your control. Which it isn’t (unless you like believd in determinism or whetever, but we’ll just go with a mainstream belief that is that people can control their actions). You make it happen.
    • one_old_coder@piefed.socialEnglish
      6·
      3 days ago

      I should be helped, because I want a ferarri

      By your fucking stupid logic, and the fact that you want money, you should impregnate women who want children. That’s the stupidest argument I have read today.